03 June 2010

Suddenly

I'm not half the man I used to be,
There's a shadow hanging over me,
oh yesterday came suddenly...


Tuesday she had her chemo, and yesterday afternoon she wasn't feeling right but couldn't exactly explain what was wrong other than she couldn't catch her breath and the oxygen didn't seem to help.

She wanted to go to the ER, so I started heading her that way. When she got to the car she collapsed. I gently lowered her to the ground and called 9-1-1. She lay there unmoving, her eyes open and unfocused, gasping for breath. I put the oxygen in her nose and held her hand until the ambulance got there.

She coded once on the way to the hospital and once more while she was there. The longest time of code was 15 minutes. The local ER stabilized her and sent her to Wake Med's cardiac care unit. She remained unresponsive to all external stimuli and had to be put on a vent to breathe.

Her children gathered around and we decided to pull the vent. It came off at 2:15 this afternoon, and at 2:42PM EST, surrounded by family, she slipped the surly bonds of earth, and reaching out, touched the face of God.

Laura Jean Primavere Card
July 20, 1964 - June 3, 2010
Mother, wife, lover and friend
No more fear, no more pain.
I love you Boo. Goodbye babe.

In lieu of flowers, please send donations to the American Cancer Society.

18 comments:

cary said...

Larry, I am so, so sorry.

You have my condolences and my prayers; my heartfelt agony for your loss.

Larry said...

Thank you Cary. We had sixteen good years, I just thought there would be a few more.

cmblake6 said...

My deepest condolences as well. Lost both of my parents (significantly later in life) to that same curse. I feel your pain, and offer my shoulder/hand.

Larry said...

Thanks cmblake6, it's greatly appreciated.

Mike Mendez said...

Shipmate, I don't have the words...
But I do know that the Apostle Paul says that the moment we are absent from the body, we are present with the Lord.
If there is anything I can do, please don't hesitate to call me or email.

Larry said...

Thanks Mike. No more fear, no more pain.
The hardest thing I had to do was sit there and hold her hand while she breathed her last.
She was so afraid if I wasn't there. I couldn't let her die afraid. Now she will not ever be afraid again.

Moose1942 said...

Larry... I don't really know what to write. Nothing any of us can say can fill the hole you must have in your heart.

May she find peace in the hereafter and may you find peace in your remaining days apart from her.

:-(

Larry said...

Thanks Moose.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry. Really. I wish you all the strength in the world to get through the worst of this, Again, I am sorry you lost her. God be with the both of you until you see each other again. -Bill Grant

Larry said...

Thanks Bill.

Timotheus said...

My heart goes out to you. My wife lost her battle with cancer four years ago, so I understand some of what you are going through. There will be harder days ahead, but don't despair. And don't be afraid to ask for help.

Larry said...

Timotheus, I am truly sorry for your loss.

Mark said...

Good lord, sir, I am so very sorry for your loss.

I will be thinking of you and your wife at our Relay for Life fundraiser next weekend.

Larry said...

Thanks Mark. It wasn't a total surprise, we both knew how it would end up. The surprise was how quickly it happened in the end.
Now that I have had time to think about it though, that's the way I'd want to go as well. Suddenly and without warning. No more fear, no more pain.
Thanks for dropping by.

Anonymous said...

Larry, check your blog every so often, an very sorry to hear of your wife, you and your are in our prayers and will be on the prayer lsit at church Sunday

Larry said...

Thanks.

PPPP said...

Larry -

Late as usual. Came here from Brigid's.

I'm very sorry for your loss, and cried as I read of her passing, even though I was already aware of the sequence of events.

I sometimes really hate our human condition, and yet, it is that same human condition that allows us to love. And without loss, how can we really know what love really is?

Take care. You'll have ups and downs, but remember, this too shall pass. Remember the good times, and the memories of the bad will fade.

Larry said...

Billy Vera has a song called "Here Comes The Dawn", the first part he is just talking through it and makes the point that to achieve happiness you have to risk total annihilation.
The down side to that, he continues, is that occasionally you will be annihilated.
But, as he says, it was indeed all worth it.
Thanks for dropping by PPPP.