22 January 2010


Tonight my ten year old and I broke the Christmas turkey wishbone. I've heard both ways, that the wish is granted for the long side or for the short side. I told him that means we both get our wishes.

I told him that he couldn't say what he wished for because it might not come true. He said he didn't think it would anyway.

Mine won't either. I think we wished for the same thing.

He told me he was worried about Mom. I told him that I was, too.

We spend a lot of time not talking about what's happening, but it's never very far from the surface. Tonight as we were talking about something different all together the subject of our eldest daughter moving up from Florida came up. She wants Eldest Daughter here so that she can spend time with her, because she doesn't feel as if she got enough time with her own mother. She misses her mother terribly.

"I don't want to die" she blurted out. "I don't want you to, either" I said, and then we cried into each other's arms for a while. That breaks one of my cardinal rules, not to let her see how it's affecting me. She knows anyway.

About that time the eldest son walked in to talk about something else. He has great timing. We then went back to our usual not talking about it.

But it's still there.

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